Remember last December when I posted about Merrill Lynch CEO John Thain?
Of course you do. The post was titled "What Tremendous Balls” “ and concerned Thain’s bid for an additional $10 million bonus after Merrill Lynch lost $11.7 billion in one year and after the stock price dropped by 73%.
By the way, the $10 million bonus was on top of his $17,307,610 compensation package.
And remember how I pointed out that Merrill Lynch had accepted $10 billion in public bailout funds? And remember how I also pointed out that Bank of America, who bought Merrill Lynch, accepted $15 billion in public bailout funds?
And remember how I said that Thain was the biggest dick on earth because he was trying to get his filthy, stinking hands on $10 million dollars for running a company that you and I just bailed out to the tune of $25 billion?
It makes me crazy just thinking about it again.
And remember how I said that we should gather all the villagers and march to his mansion with pitchforks and torches, rend him limb from limb and burn his riding stables to the ground?
Remember all of this?
Well, my commute to work this morning was brightened considerably by the news that John Thain was summarily fired yesterday.
Turns out that this fucker spent $1.2 million dollars redecorating his Manhattan office – including $87,000 for area rugs, $25,000 for a pedestal table and $68,000 for a 19th century credenza.
And all of this is happening just as Bank of America last week got the Federal Government to agree to give them another $20 billion in capital (that’s $45 billion so far in case you’re keeping count) as well as $118 billion in asset guarantees.
You should be taking this personally because John Thain has reached right into your wallet and your kid’s college fund and ripped you off. This is nothing less than sneaking into your house and threatening your family.
And you know what? You cross my kid and you cross me. I want a piece of this fucking shit-wad. I want to take a baseball bat to this piece of shit and show him what happens when you bring harm to my family.
Knowing that he lost his job isn’t really getting it done for me. I want blood.
And you know who else I want to see drawn and quartered? Amy Borrus, Deputy Director of the Council of Institutional Investors. Of Thain’s redecorating she said “Spending company money on a lavish re-do at a time when Merrill’s finances were rocky sends the wrong message.”
Sends the wrong message? You fucking apologist asshole Amy Borrus! Sends the wrong message? This is a fucking high crime! Sends the wrong message?? Amy, welcome to the asshole club.
You know who else gets a lifetime membership in the asshole club? Clinton Howell. Want to know why - other than his arrogant fucking name I mean? Clinton Howell is an antiques dealer who says that Thain’s decorator is “a very smart guy and he buys very good things. It’s very likely that what he bought was worth the money.”
He went on to say “What John Thain did with his office is a little like noting that somebody failed to turn on his blinker before driving into a train,”
Hey Clinton Howell! Fuck you too!
But fuck John Thain most of all. Bring him to me. I want to see that fuck standing before me and begging for mercy.
And I will look back at him and laugh and laugh. Batter up you piece of shit!